crafty

so here is what i have been working on. i got the pattern for jayson 6 years ago when he was deployed the first time. i was going to surprise him with it when he got home but that didn't happen. so now i am actually going to finish it. i have 1/4 of it done.

what i have done



what it will look like, sorry its blurry

health concerns

so there are few things going on at home and in my family. first off lucian has a mild speech delay. i'm not so sure how i feel about this. i can, however, name the emotions that have come with this, guilt, saddness, and so much more love for my little guy. i know a speech delay is nothing compared to what some little ones have but it still hurts. every mom wants their child to be perfect and develop normally too. he is fine in everyting else and may have compensated in his comprehension. so our next steps are to have his ears checked at the audiology clinic and i am calling the state program, help me grow, and they will send someone to our house to evaluate lucian and then they will take care of the speech therapy. his pediatrician says his delay is mild not sure how they measure the severity so maybe the state program can explain that to me. will keep everyone updated on this as it progresses.

next is my wonderful, man of few words, strong grandpa. he is the one steady man in my life besides jayson and lucian. he means so much to me and i am so scared about this. he started his radiation therapy this week. so far he has had three treatments. i'm sure he is scared too, i know i would be. i am with the rest of the family and hoping the cancer will go away and stay away. i am also hoping that the radiation won't make him too sick. i know he will get sick but i just don't want it to be horrible. i love my grandpa so much and just want him to be okay and to be around for quite a bit longer.

along with grandpa is my grandma. this woman is amazing and has had a HUGE impact on my life. she is having a few different problems with her back. also there is a concern with one of her kidneys. we are all hoping it is benign and will go away as well. i just want her to be healthy and be around longer as well.

i love my grandparents so much they mean the world to me and are wonderful grandparents and have always been my safe place. they don't push they just let me talk when i am ready. they both make me laugh and both have taught me great things in my life.

lucian's 2 year pics

went to sears yesterday and got his 2 year pics done. it took him about 20 mins to warm up but as soon as he did he turned on the charm, cuteness, and incredible blue eyes. they turned out great and i can't wait to pick them up on the 19th!! all the grandparents and great grandparents are getting the same 5x7 it is the first one.

now the gparents and aunt and uncles will get each of these as a wallet

this one is a close up of the face and the 2 isn't in the pic


okay now the rest of them

baby #2

we have decided that we are ready to have another baby! i know most of the moms from online know that already as well as my mom and dad. i don't think my grandma, granny, and doree don't know. right now things are kind of at a stand still because i just stopped my birth control last month. as of right now i am just waiting for my body to get over the shock of losing those synthetic hormones. i have read so many bad things about birth control and synthetic hormones that i won't be using them ever again. after we are done having children i plan to have my tubes tied. right now i am using some natural progesterone cream to get things going again and to kind of help my body get balanced again. i will definately keep everyone updated as things happen. i just ask that everyone not ask me how things are going with that. that is one of the things that stressed me out so much while we were ttc lucian. oh and also i still have my fertility medicine from lucian and i do plan to take them again to get pregnant with the next one.

as far as names go we already have them picked out. nobody take them please, ;)for a boy nikolai or nicholai, not sure yet, liam and for a girl aurelia suzanne. if we have a boy we will call him niko or nicho, depending on the spelling. it will sound like nee-ko and if we have a girl we will call her rea sounding like ray-uh. and of course all the other crazy nicknames we give him/her. lucian has so many nicknames but the main ones are lu, luie, boog, and weirdo. then there are variations of those.

please wish us good luck, pray, and think good thoughts! hoping for a late '09 baby!!

xmas fun

we had a great xmas as a family this year. jayson was gone last year so this year it was just the three of us and great. lucian really got into this year.

big yawn still waking up


opening books with dad


not so sure about the trike





opening presents






playing with daddy



he loves his new toys